Her eyes met his frankly as ever, but they were full of tears. "Yes,"
she said; "I wish you would talk to me. I wish you would give me a
great scolding. I never needed it so much in my life. I meant to come
home and be very good, and do everything I could to make you happy,
but it all grows worse every day. I thought at first I was tired with
the last days of school, but it is something more than that. I don't
wish in the least that I were back at school, but I can't understand
anything; there is something in me that wants to be busy, and can't
find anything to do. I don't mean to be discontented; I don't want to
be anywhere else in the world."
"There is enough to do," answered the doctor, as placidly as possible,
for this was almost the first time he had noticed distinctly the
mother's nature in her daughter; a restless, impatient, miserable sort
of longing for The Great Something Else, as Dr. Ferris had once called
it. "Don't fret yourself, Nan, yours is a short-lived sorrow; for if
you have any conscience at all about doing your work you will be sure
enough to find it."
"I think I have found it at last, but I don't know whether any one
else will agree with me," half whispered poor Nan; while the doctor,
in spite of himself, of his age, and experience, and sympathy, and
self-control, could not resist a smile. "I hate to talk about myself
or to be sentimental, but I want to throw my whole love and life into
whatever there is waiting for me to do, and--I began to be afraid I
had missed it somehow.
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