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Collins, Wilkie, 1824-1889

"No Name"

Wragge's from whom, as I told
you, my wife had expectations. Very good. What do you think I did? I
invested the whole of my capital, at one fell swoop, in advertisements,
and purchased my drugs and my pill-boxes on credit. The result is
now before you. Here I am, a Grand Financial Fact. Here I am, with my
clothes positively paid for; with a balance at my banker's; with
my servant in livery, and my gig at the door; solvent, flourishing,
popular--and all on a Pill."
Magdalen smiled. The captain's face assumed an expression of mock
gravity; he looked as if there was a serious side to the question, and
as if he meant to put it next.
"It's no laughing matter to the public, my dear," he said. "They can't
get rid of me and my Pill; they must take us. There is not a single
form of appeal in the whole range of human advertisement which I am
not making to the unfortunate public at this moment. Hire the last new
novel, there I am, inside the boards of the book. Send for the last new
Song--the instant you open the leaves, I drop out of it. Take a
cab--I fly in at the window in red. Buy a box of tooth-powder at the
chemist's--I wrap it up for you in blue.


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