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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"You Never Can Tell"

You were only an
ordinary young lady, too ordinary to allow tame lieutenants to go as far
as I went. That's all. I shall not trouble you with conventional
apologies. Good-bye. (He makes resolutely for the door.)
GLORIA. Stop. (He hesitates.) Oh, will you understand, if I tell
you the truth, that I am not making an advance to you?
VALENTINE. Pooh! I know what you're going to say. You think you're
not ordinary---that I was right---that you really have those depths in
your nature. It flatters you to believe it. (She recoils.) Well, I
grant that you are not ordinary in some ways: you are a clever girl
(Gloria stifles an exclamation of rage, and takes a threatening step
towards him); but you've not been awakened yet. You didn't care: you
don't care. It was my tragedy, not yours. Good-bye. (He turns to the
door. She watches him, appalled to see him slipping from her grasp. As
he turns the handle, he pauses; then turns again to her, offering his
hand.) Let us part kindly.
GLORIA (enormously relieved, and immediately turning her back on him
deliberately.) Good-bye. I trust you will soon recover from the wound.
VALENTINE (brightening up as it flashes on him that he is master of
the situation after all). I shall recover: such wounds heal more than
they harm. After all, I still have my own Gloria.


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